When Your Heart is Broken

I am not naive. I know that life can be seriously hard. Why does it have to be so heartbreaking? Last night, Jimmy and I sat in a room with two of our good friends. We listened to their story and you could almost hear their hearts breaking. The longer they talked the more you just want to reach out and give them a big hug and tell them everything is going to be alright. Well in the end, I did give out a big hug to both of them, but I just couldn't say it was going to be okay.

In life their are so many unknowns. Thankfully God takes care of us. I don't believe that religion is a crutch by any means but I am SO glad that I do have a Savior who loves me and cares for me and provides for me and I can lean on Him when I know I can't take one more breath on my own. In these times, I seek to learn the lesson of Romans 5:3-5 "also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." Then when I have learned to find the bright side of my problems maybe I will be able to help someone find the light at the end of their tunnel.

To all of you with the gift of mercy and to whom this comes very easily, I applaud you. Thank you for picking up the slack for people like me who have very little mercy. Thank you for showing us by example how to minister to the broken hearted. May we never give up even when it feels like our hearts are broken into a billion tiny pieces for Christ is the healer of our souls. He loves us, and He will build us back stronger than we were before.

You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise." Psalm 51:16 & 17

"He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." Psalm 147:3

Working with Broken Families

Just about every youth group on the planet will have at least one blended family or family of divorce. This group is becoming larger and larger every year as divorce and remarriage become more common and accepted. I personally didn’t realize just how hard it can be to work with these families until we moved to our current church. I would estimate that 90% of our youth come from these types of families! It’s shocking!

In these families there are whole new dynamics, new problems, and new pitfalls to avoid. Often the roles of parents are confused and students are given too much freedom too soon. Or the other side of that coin is that they may have no freedom and receive no attention that they so desperately crave. So what do I do about it? I’m just the youth minister’s wife. What’s my role in all of this?

5 Guidelines I use when Working with Blended & Broken Families
1. Do your best to figure out the family structure. Who belongs to whom? Who are half-siblings? Step siblings, etc.? Who do the students live with?
2. Don’t take sides between the parents (if at all possible), but act in the students’ best interest.
3. Always listen but don’t take for granted that you are hearing the absolute truth. Everyone has their own take on the situation.
4. Show lots of care and attention but proceed with caution as their family situations are often volatile.
5. Love on them and be Jesus to them no matter how they might treat you. You may be the only witness in their lives.

Colossians 3:12 &13 “Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”