Managing Money Madness Pt 1: Budgeting

Yesterday we talked about Money Madness and how it all begins by losing perspective on the role money should play in your life and your marriage. Over the next couple of days (or however long), I want to provide you with some tools to help keep your perspectives in their proper place and to help you manage the money madness.

Tool Number One: Budgeting

Many of us have heard about budgeting and that it's important, but if you're like me I never actually knew how to set up a budget that works until a little over two years ago. Having a plan in place has tremendously reduced the money stress for Jimmy and I. It's not that we make more; it's just that we are better stewards of the money God has given us because we now have a plan in place to help us accomplish our goals.

What is Budgeting?

According to Dictionary.com these are just some of the definitions of the word "Budget".
Budget –noun

1.	an estimate, often itemized, of expected income and expense for a given period in the future.

2.	a plan of operations based on such an estimate.

3.	an itemized allotment of funds, time, etc., for a given period.

4.

the total sum of money set aside or needed for a purpose: the construction budget.

In Christiana terms, a budget is my plan for what to do with my money this month. Now that we have talked about what a budget is, we can talk about how to make a budget.

Making a Simple Budget

One of the things that helped Jimmy and I to get our finances on track was taking one of Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University (FPU) classes. The course covers all the basics of budgeting, getting out of debt, planning for the future, investing, and more. It was a very useful class so I want to pause a moment and give you some links to more information about FPU and Dave Ramsey. If you want to know more about Dave Ramsey, click here. If you would like more information about an FPU class in your area, click here. Part of the reason I wanted to give you these links is because Dave has really helped us and part of it is because I want to refer you to Dave's simple budgeting forms to help you make your own plan.

Step One: Figure out How Much You Make Each Month

Add up all income sources for you and your spouse to get the total amount of income you will have for the month. I know that this is trickier for some because you are not salaried or you might work on commission. If you are in these situations, I would base your total income off an average of your income for the last few months. This might take a little research on your part but you can do it!

Step Two: List all Your Bills and Expenses for the Month

The first part is easy. Most of us know which bills we have to pay every month and about how much they are going to cost. So write them all out (I would also make a note of when payment is due--we will use this later). Now that you have listed rent/house payment, car payments, cell phones, internet, cable, credit card payments, school loan payments, etc. It's time to work on the expenses. This is a little tricky and may take some estimating. Do the best you can in estimating how much you spend on clothing, hair cuts, toiletries, medications, gas, food, etc. Don't worry you will probably change this later anyway, so just give your best estimate for now.

Step Three: Make Your Budget

Now this is the truly hard part. It's not that the dividing of funds is hard. It's seeing just how out of whack our finances can be that is hard. CLICK HERE for Dave's downloadable budget forms. They are easy to use and they can help you to think of areas you might have missed.

A COUPLE OF NOTES

*Your budget WILL NOT be perfect the first time! Dave estimates that it takes 3 to 4 months for you to get most of the bugs worked out of your budget.
*Your budget MOST LIKELY will change each month although some items will remain the same.
*The key to a successful budget it to PLAN AHEAD. You might not need to have any car repairs done this month, but if you plan ahead and budget $20 a month for car repairs that you save until you do need them then when your car breaks down and costs $400 to fix it won't be nearly as stressful because you have been saving money toward such an event.

Now back to making your budget. The best option is to make what is called a zero based budget. This means that you plan for ALL money you make with a remainder of $0 unplanned. This means that you will even plan how much spending money you and your spouse will get to do whatever you want with it. I suggest that you start filling in the form by writing in your necessities housing, food, transportation, etc. Then work on your other priorities such as bills. Finally, use the remainder for savings, spending, etc. NOTE: DON'T FORGET TO TITHE! I personally believe that this should be #1. Jimmy and I have found that when we commit to giving God His money first, we will always have enough to pay for our necessities even if we don't always know where the money is going to come from.

Give It a Go!

So take some time and have a "budget meeting" with your spouse. Do your best to estimate your income and expenses. If you need helps or have comments/questions, feel free to come back and post or you can look for answers on Dave Ramsey's Website. Happy budgeting!

Money Madness

If you are married, I would bet a whole heck of a lot that you have had at least one fight with your spouse about money. If you are single then you probably just fight yourself about what to do with money. In today's world money is one of those things that you can't live without because we just don't barter in the US. You have to go to work and make money to pay the bills, buy the groceries, put gas in the car, and all the million other things you do. So what's the big deal? Money is necessary--a necessary evil, some would say--but it can't be the ruling force in your life, marriage, or ministry.

Why is Money so Maddening?

Today I was looking at the statistics and money is still one of the leading causes of divorce. Why does something so small as paper and coins cause so much stress and drama in our lives? I think the answer is two fold.

First, you need money to meet your basic needs such as food, clothing, and shelter. If you don't feel that you have the money you need to meet these needs and wants then things start to get hairy and many people panic.

Second, money becomes maddening when you lose the proper perspective of its role in your life. The Bible says, "For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs." (1 Tim. 6:10) When we lose sight of the fact money is designed to meet our basic needs rather than to be an object of love and obsession, we give love too great a priority in our lives. It becomes maddening because the lack of money now is an issue of love and statisfaction. When you love money you let it define you. It is who you are. It shows your social status and importance in society. It is no longer just a tool. It must be obtained at all costs. This is where marriages get into trouble.

Why Money Ends Marriages.
This is just my opinion, but I believe that money is one of the leading causes of divorce when one or both spouses lose their perspective and begin to love money. Then the issues of mismanagement, lack of funds, who makes more, and who spends more become mangnified to the point that they become life altering issues. You become selfish of things and people when you love them. It is the same with money. If you love it and you don't feel you are getting your fair share of it you become angry. If you are living in anger, you can't live in love. In the realm of human capabilities these two emotions, love and anger, are very mutually exclusive. Why do you think Jesus says, "No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money." (Matt. 6:24 & Luke 16:13)

Your Thoughts

I have given you my thoughts on Money Madness. Later this week, we will talk about ways to help manage your money and fight the money madness. But for now I want to hear your thoughts. Why do you think money is so maddening? Why do so many marriages end over money?

Mentioning Mentoring

A few days ago, I was working in our home office when I heard my husband talking on the phone. It turns out that Jimmy was talking to one of “his boys”, the term he uses to affectionately refer to the group of young men he has invested the most in over the years. These are the students who have benefited most from the type of mentoring we discussed in “TIME and LOVE the Languages of Discipleship”. They spent well over an hour on the phone talking about life, what God is doing in their lives, the struggles he was having, and other things. I frequently hear these kinds of conversations in our home and I did not pay too much attention to what was being said, but my ears did perk up at one key statement that made me stop and think…

“I’m 34 years old and have been in the ministry for more than 10 years, but I still have older men in my life who mentor me and aren’t afraid to tell me if I am making wrong decisions in life or in ministry…” Jimmy openly shared.

The Apostle Paul on Mentoring
This simple statement made me take pause. It also brought to mind something the apostle Paul once said, “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” (Phil. 3:12-14). Even Paul, who did SO many great things for Christ, did not consider himself to be perfect. He had men in his life that taught him what it meant to be a Christian and to serve Christ. Why do you think he partnered with Barnabas on his first two mission trips? He needed someone to work with him who had been a Christian for a while and “knew the ropes” so to speak. Paul also goes on to encourage the believers to “Join with others in following my example, brothers, and take note of those who live according to the pattern we gave you.” (Phil. 3:17).

Thoughts to Ponder
* Do you have someone in your life that is mentoring you?
* Do you consider yourself to be at a point that you no longer need someone to “tell you how to do things” and don’t feel you need a mentor?
* What does your attitude toward mentoring say about you and your ministry?
* How does your attitude toward being mentored affect how you mentor others?

Closing Remarks
Mentors may come and go in your life, but I personally believe you always need to have people in your life who are older, wiser, more experienced, and who aren’t afraid to get in your face about the important issues (if needed). The best mentoring relationships often grow naturally. Instead of spending all of your time seeking out the perfect mentor, spend time in prayer asking God to send this person into your life, develop relationships with people who are mentor material, and be willing to accept the leadership and challenges they will bring when your mentor comes on the scene. They may have been there all along and you just didn’t know it or just didn’t care.

the Battle of Scripture Memory

Finally! I get a chance to sit down and breathe! I know we have all felt this way. Between church, family, full-time jobs/full-time parenting, and who knows what else so many of us have very little time or mind power to spare. We multi-task and work thru lunch so often we don’t know what it means to have a moment of peace. Here I am in the middle of one of those weeks, and I suddenly realized something…When was the last time I took the time to memorize scripture?

Really? What’s the Big Deal?

You might be snickering in derision at my big epiphany or you might now be wondering “What’s the big deal? I read my Bible. Why do I need to memorize it?” There are so many other things we give priority over this valuable spiritual discipline that very few Christians still realize just how important scripture memory really is.

Why Scripture Memory IS a Big Deal

Take a minute and hear me out. I believe there are two reasons that scripture memory is a big deal.

Number 1: God Commanded It

What better reason is there to do something than God telling you to do it?! In Proverbs 7:2-4 says, “Keep my commands and you will live; guard my teachings as the apple of your eye. Bind them on your fingers; write them on the tablet of your heart.” Very few things were actually written down at the time that these verses were written and the things that were written down were of the utmost importance. Therefore, when God tells them to “write” His commands on the tablets of their hearts, it conveys a deep sense of importance and significance.

Number 2: It Gives Us the Strength to Keep Going

As I think about continuing on the path God has laid out for my life, I think of Ephesians chapter 6. Although the words “memorize scripture” never appear in this passage we do see the importance of Truth. In verse 14, Truth is compared to the belt in the armor of a Roman Centurion. A Centurion’s belt was 6 to 8 inches wide. It allowed freedom of movement. Most importantly, it held all the other pieces of the armor together and all of the soldier’s weapons were attached to it. In the same way, Truth holds us together and gives us the weapons we need to fight the daily battles that crop up in our way.

Practical Application

Although there are many other reasons that scripture memory is important, I just wanted to focus on these two because they speak for themselves. Now the question is, how can you practice scripture memory in your busy life?

* Tape an index card with this week’s memory verse on it to a place you look multiple times a day. Each time you look at this card take the time to read thru the verse. Some locations I have heard of are the refrigerator, the side of your computer monitor, the bathroom mirror, and in the shower (although I suggest laminating the card for this one).

*Write and copy the verse on paper 7 times each day for one week. I have heard this works best if you do it during your quiet time and you make all 7 copies at the same time.

*Memorize small but important pieces of scripture. It will be much easier to memorize John 3:16 & 17 rather than the whole chapter of John 3. Start small you can always go bigger later.

“Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then…” Ephesians 6:13-14a